Fixies Not Legal in OR

BikePortland.org has a detailed and interesting review of a court case regarding fixie bicycles and the definition of a brake:

“The state is overreaching in seeking to define a brake as a lever and a caliper. The question remains; is the fixed gear the brake? The statutes are clear that the answer is yes.”

To solidify his point, he took out a huge Webster’s dictionary and opened it to the word “brake.” The definition stated that a brake is a “device to arrest the motion of a vehicle.” It did not stipulate anything about a distinct lever or caliper.

The best part is the dialogue between cop and victim:

Now it was time for Officer Barnum to ask questions. He asked Holland,

“What would you do if your chain broke?”

Holland:

“I would use my feet.”

Officer Barnum:

“What if your leg muscles had a spasm?”

Indeed. And what if your legs were suddenly amputated by giant fireballs from angry dragons on the street? Then how would you stop?

The judge seemed unable to come up with a reasonable definition:

In the Judge’s opinion, gearing itself and/or leg muscles are not a sufficient source of braking power. He said,

“The brake must be a device separate from the musclulature of the rider. Take me for instance. I don’t have leg muscles as strong as a messenger…how would I stop safely?”

He then turned directly to Ginsberg and said,

“If your client had a stick she could rub against her tire, you’d have a case.”

I thought you needed twelve sticks to have a case. But seriously, this judge is clearly a fool for saying that muscles are not allowed as a braking device because they are not a separate device and therefore may not work effectively. Did he not realize that muscles are used to operate all brake levers on a bicycle? The chainrings and crank arms are levers separate from the muscles of the rider. Did he also not realize that something “to rub against a tire” could include a shoe? And why not rub something on the ground instead of the tire? Cable cars have a brake that hits the ground, which might also be called a shoe. Anyway, the fixie brake debate is a good one to watch.

American Wedding

by Gogol Bordello

Have you ever been to American wedding?
Where is the vodka, where is marinated herring?
Where is the musicians that got the taste?
Where is the supply that going last three days?
Where is the band that like fanfare?
Going to keep it going 24 hour.

Bah,
Bah-babba-babba-bah,
Bah-babba-babba-bah.
Ba dee didi didi dow.

Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah dot dah dot dot dot
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah Super dah dot dot dah

Instead it’s one in the morning
and DJ is patching up the cords
Everybody’s full of cake
Staring at the floor
Proper couples start to mumble
That it’s time to go
People gotta get up early
Yep, they gotta go

Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah Super dah dot dot dah
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah Super dah dot dot dah

People got to get up early
And she’s got a boyfriend
And this whole fucking thing
Is just one huge disappointment

Nothing gets these bitches going
Not even Gypsy Kings
Nobody talks about my Super Theory of Super Everythings!

So be you Donald Trump
Or be an anarchist
Make sure that your wedding
Doesn’t end up like this

Dooooooh dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Mmmmmmmm dah dot dah dot dah dah
Mmmmmmmm dah dot dah dot dah dah

I understand the cultures
of a different kind
But here word celebration
Just doesn’t come to mind

Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah Super dah dot dot dah
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah Super dah dot dot dah

Have you ever been to American wedding?
Where is the vodka, where is marinated herring?
Where is the musicians that got the haste?
Where is the supply that going last three days?
Where is the band that like fanfare?
Going to keep it going 24 hour.

Bah,
Bah-babba-babba-bah,
Bah-babba-babba-bah.
Ba dee didi didi dow.

Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dah dot dah dot dah dah
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah dot dah dot dot dot
Daaaaaah dot dah dot dah Super dah dot dot dah

Or something like that…

Deutsche Telekom breach

Stories like this one in Deutsche Welle suggest I’ll need to start revising my graphs again:

Deutsche Telekom has confirmed that personal information from 17 million of its mobile phone customers was stolen in 2006, including secret telephone numbers of high-profile politicians and celebrities.

Deutsche Telekom said the stolen data includes customer mobile phone numbers, addresses, dates of birth and, in some cases, email addresses. Bank information or credit card numbers were not accessed, said the Bonn-based firm.