by Daniel Halpern

We were desperate. No, we were beyond desperation.
We were beside ourselves. At wit’s end.
We said we could slip outside, that was it.
Get in the car and just keep on driving. Never look back.
No second thoughts. No chance of posing as salt.

But they’d find us, you said. They’d bring us back
and it would begin again. We could start a new life.
We could begin again, trying the something new.
The road ahead again untrod, winding beyond the next curve
with speed and assurance. Did I say we were desperate?

The lightning took over and revealed the night.
The landscape looked altered–rocks and trees
no longer where they had been hours before.
We hadn’t made a move, but we were desperate.
Desperate still–oh, desperate beyond description.

But, they’d find us, you said. They’d bring us back.
We said we could slip outside, that was it.
Never look back. No second thoughts.
We were desperate. At wit’s end. Beside ourselves.
The landscape looked altered, beyond description.

We could begin again. Something new,
The landscape looked altered. Never look back.
Did I say desperate to try something new?
A new life? The road ahead untrod, winding beyond.
We hadn’t made a move–just kept on driving.

Ralph, thanks for the poem. I was great working with you. Good luck in retirement! I also like the Dylan song, Restless Farewell, that you recommended:

Oh all the money that in my whole life I did spend,
Be it mine right or wrongfully,
I let it slip gladly past the hands of my friends
To tie up the time most forcefully.
But the bottles are done,
We’ve killed each one
And the table’s full and overflowed.
And the corner sign
Says it’s closing time,
So I’ll bid farewell and be down the road.

Oh ev’ry girl that ever I’ve touched,
I did not do it harmfully.
And ev’ry girl that ever I’ve hurt,
I did not do it knowin’ly.
But to remain as friends and make amends
You need the time and stay behind.
And since my feet are now fast
And point away from the past,
I’ll bid farewell and be down the line.

Oh ev’ry foe that ever I faced,
The cause was there before we came.
And ev’ry cause that ever I fought,
I fought it full without regret or shame.
But the dark does die
As the curtain is drawn and somebody’s eyes
Must meet the dawn.
And if I see the day
I’d only have to stay,
So I’ll bid farewell in the night and be gone.

Oh, ev’ry thought that’s strung a knot in my mind,
I might go insane if it couldn’t be sprung.
But it’s not to stand naked under unknowin’ eyes,
It’s for myself and my friends my stories are sung.
But the time ain’t tall,
Yet on time you depend and no word is possessed
By no special friend.
And though the line is cut,
It ain’t quite the end,
I’ll just bid farewell till we meet again.

Oh a false clock tries to tick out my time
To disgrace, distract, and bother me.
And the dirt of gossip blows into my face,
And the dust of rumors covers me.
But if the arrow is straight
And the point is slick,
It can pierce through dust no matter how thick.
So I’ll make my stand
And remain as I am
And bid farewell and not give a damn.

Here’s a true story of poetry in action.

Heather Wagner, a 26-year old mother of three in Texas, had her husband deployed to South Korea in 2005. She describes on her website how she felt when she watched a news broadcast soon after her own goodbyes where the “camera kept focusing in on all the crying women”:

“Well sure they are crying now,” said Heather, “They are saying goodbye. But if the cameras followed these women home they would see how they pick themselves up and take care of business”. She wanted James to know that he didn’t have to feel guilty about leaving to do his job. ” I understand that his absence is both necessary and important and I honestly believe that the support a servicemen gets at home directly affects his ability to do his job and support the mission. When I wrote Keep Living, I was trying to tell my husband that I was behind him 100 percent and ready to take care of things here while he’s gone. I was also trying to paint a word picture for others who see the news broadcast with the crying women and don’t realize how strong the military spouse really is. This doesn’t mean that we have to be thrilled about them leaving, it means that we accept it and stay determined to keep living and serving while they are gone.”

Mrs. Wagner then brushed off her performance skills, apparently dormant since 1999 when she married and started a family. She wrote and sang “Keep Living”, and then made copies on her own computer and gave them away. Word quickly spread to the point where she started selling the music on her website and donating a portion of the proceeds to OperationHomefront. Here are the lyrics:

They always seem to show a woman standing at a gate clinging to her children as her husband walks away. When duty calls he’ll do what he’s gotta do. and even though I don’t get paid, I serve my country too.

Because I know he’s where he needs to be. I know he always thinks of me. and yeah, I know the stars he sees are the stars I see each night. Until the day he makes it home I’ll take care of things on my own. When he’s
here he’ll be glad to see that we just kept living .

With pride and dedication I take the wheel when I’m on my own. By the time I reach the driveway those first
tears need to be gone. I get the lunches packed, pay bills, and cut the lawn, and then I toss and turn and tell
myself get some sleep before the break of dawn.

Because I know he’s where he needs to be. I know he always thinks of me. and yeah, I know the stars he sees
are the stars I see each night. Until the day he makes it home I’ll take care of things on my own. When he’s
here he’ll be glad to see that we just kept living .

I don’t deny the river that I’ve cried or the pleading that goes on in my prayers each night

I know you’re where you need to be. I know you always think of me. Yeah I know the stars you see , are the
stars I see each night. But baby till you make it home know that I’m okay and not alone. I’m as strong as I
will ever be, and we’ll just keep living.

I’m as proud of you as I can be. Just keep living.

It’s awesome to see the power of a poem and the influence a single woman can have in so many people’s lives. Interesting that she sings about how to keep living and be strong, while a portion of the profits are sent to a private non-profit for military families. She is surely doing a lot of good for people in need. I can’t help but wonder, however, why the military itself is so unable to care for its soldiers that care and assistance has to come from outside the organization. Is this due to symptoms of system-wide failure or just gaps in the safety net?